So, some history of my story… our story… One part of that is difficult to get others to understand ~ the WHY?
Well, after 4 miscarriages, God decided it was time to honor a promise – remember God Promises, BUT no matter what that promise may be, it will ALWAYS be on HIS TIME…. the waiting for HIS TIME is a very hard part….. especially when your not in a relationship with God. Yeah, that was me. I mean I was a prayerful, church going person… but I wasn’t in a relationship with HIM. Being a prayerful,, church going person was all about praying for me, what I wanted to happen; being in a relationship with God is so different. A relationship means give and take; its not all about one side. And it is so much bigger than anything else. Well, where was I…. oh yeah ~ a promise. SO … along comes a doctor who is willing to go the extra mile to help …. putting me on bed rest at 7 weeks because of bleeding and then again at 28 weeks because of contractions. So – C meets the world and I am instantly crying and on day 3, contemplating the day he will marry one day and leave his mama…. oh yeah, I was in love with this new little man in my life.
Somewhere along the lines, God prompts for homeschooling…. Wait WHAT? no, I’m not hearing you right. I will just keep moving through our days and working nights. Then when C was 2, God started bringing people into my circle of friends and sending me subtle messages about homeschooling. OF COURSE, at the time, I didn’t see it as God’s prompting or guiding my path, now looking back, I can see Him in every aspect of everything going on ~ Yes even the 2 miscarriages (for a total of 6 in life) in the last 2 years. God knew what we were going to be going through this year and that a body could only take so much ~ and pregnancy takes a-lot from a body and even more so when that body is already tired from working nights and homeschooling days….. and that same body was about to fight a cancer battle and mounds of additional stress heaped on it.
God is so great with his promises. Even though my faith and trust are completely in Him – He still surprises me with His provision. See… The week I found out about the cancer, that weekend, a Prophetic Pastor – Ivan Tate was coming to town. A saw the event and then a wonderful friend reminded me about it… and we ended up going as a family. If Pastor Tate comes up to you and the Spirit speaks to him, he will tell you what the Spirit says, otherwise if the Spirit is silent, He will bless you and not falsely tell you something. Well I was like 3rd or 4th in line. and he blessed or gave a Spirit word to the ones before me, then he paused when he stood before me and said two things, “your family will eat with the ravens and your bills will get paid,” and he repeated it and gave me a verse to look up. Now, since I am currently unable to work because of surgical complications and then radiation coming up, lack of my income can be a major hardship as I am the main contributor. God’s provision just shows up when it needs to. I praise and thank Him every step of the way. Tithe right back to Him, in honor of what He is doing. My journey is difficult ~ but it will Honor and Glorify Him and what He does to those who seek Him and are faithful to Him ~ not just a fair weather friend. Life’s journey is not always fair weather. Wait What? it is not always fair weather, shouldn’t it be….. nope. Sanctification has never been done through fair weather – faith and trust in God builds a firmer foundation and soars high when we remain faithful in the tough times, the challenging times…. the times that sanctify us.
I have lab work to do before physical therapy today- it is time to find out what my TSH is doing. If high enough, I will be able to do my preliminary scan to decide if I have to have the radioactive GLOW time…
God Bless – I hope you continue to follow this journey.